


Drive

by american_homos_story



Category: Percy Jackson and the Olympians & Related Fandoms - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Inspired by Music, Lots of Angst, M/M, this series went from fluff to angst so quickly I'm so sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-05
Updated: 2016-03-05
Packaged: 2018-05-24 22:34:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,151
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6169258
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/american_homos_story/pseuds/american_homos_story
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Percy and Nico take a drive and discuss the future</p>
            </blockquote>





	Drive

**Author's Note:**

> Based on and including lyrics from:  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2oI-BsWbIg4

Percy loved driving.

 

The last time he had driven a car, a pegasus had landed on the hood and left 4 pretty nasty dents. He had also been accompanied by Rachel Elizabeth Dare, who he had maybe briefly had a romantic attraction to? That was all a blur now.

 

This time, there was no pegasus, no Rachel, and mostly no confusion. Just him and Nico, shooting down the highway with the windows down and the music up. Nico couldn’t sing to save his life but that didn’t stop him from belting along with the playlist that he had created. Percy didn’t listen to a lot of music but he was usually ok with whatever Nico played. Today’s mix seemed to include an awful lot of Halsey.

 

Every so often Percy would look over at Nico and smile; Nico was so engrossed in his singing that he didn’t notice the older boy’s glances. There was an issue though. Percy and Nico had stopped talking.

 

Percy couldn’t pinpoint the exact moment when it started happening because it was so gradual, but their relationship had gone quiet and it drove Percy mad. Even though just Nico’s presence was enough to make him happy, the silence that used to be so calm and inviting had turned stressful. Of course Percy was partly to blame, after all he wasn’t talking either. But he was craving conversation and communication, and it just wasn’t happening anymore. He thought back to earlier in the summer after the dance Percy had organized. The two boys had sneaked away to Percy’s cabin and shared their first time together. Percy couldn’t tell if something about bringing sex into their relationship had changed anything, but from what he could tell things had been normal, if not better, afterwards.

 

So for most of the drive, Percy had kept quiet and listened to Nico sing along to the angstiest playlist he had heard in a long time. That put him off a little too; Nico had been so happy lately, so the sudden switch back to more emotional music was mildly concerning. Percy soaked in the lyrics of yet another Halsey song:

 

_All we do is drive, all we do is think about the feelings that we hide_

_All we do is sit in silence waiting for a sign_

_Sick and full of pride_

_All we do is drive_

 

He felt his chest tighten and looked over at Nico, whose carefree singing was now more subdued. Nico rolled up his window and made an attempt to salvage his hair after it had been so beaten by the wind. Percy did the same, turning down the music as the window closed.

 

“Hey, I was listening to that!”

 

“Yeah, me too, Did those…did those lyrics mean anything to you?”  
  
Nico just shrugged and turned to look out the window, still humming quietly to the song.

 

Percy sighed, exasperated, and shut the music off.

 

“Percy!”

 

“We need to talk.”

 

“What do you mean? About what?”  
  
“That’s the thing, I don’t even know what to talk about anymore. It’s like we ran out of things to say to each other or something, and I’m worried.”

 

Nico sighed. “Percy, I’m just scared.”

 

“About?”

 

He turned back around to face Percy as they left the highway, circling the exit ramp. “I’m afraid I’m gonna lose you.”  
  
Percy scoffed. “Why would you lose me? I love you, you know that!”

 

Nico nodded and sniffled. “I know, and I love you too, but soon you’re gonna move away to college and I’m still gonna be stuck at Camp Half-Blood. And I love Hazel, and Annabeth, and Jason, but they’re not _you_.”

 

Percy sighed. “Why didn’t you tell me about this sooner?”

 

“Well it’s not like I can change anything. You’re leaving no matter what I say, so I figured I just wouldn’t say anything.”

 

“You can’t do that, you can’t just shut me out.”  
  
“Why not? Why can’t we keep pretending like we’re this perfect couple that everybody looks up to? Why can’t we just stay in the spotlight and make people believe this lie that everything is ok? I mean, I’m starting to believe it myself.”

 

Percy pulled into a gas station and parked the car. “How long have you felt like this?”

 

Nico shrugged. “A while I guess. I know it’s dumb, I was the one who convinced you that coming out would be worth it, and for you I think it was! But for me…”

 

Percy gently placed a hand on Nico’s shoulder. “Please, just tell me. Maybe I can help?”

 

“No, you can’t help. You can’t help it that you’re Percy fucking Jackson, the most powerful demigod of this decade! You can’t help that everybody is absolutely in love with you, but after everything they’re still afraid of me. They’ve put us on this pedestal and they see us as some kind of picture of perfection, but it’s all bullshit. I _hate_ being in the spotlight, and I love you, but I don’t know how much longer I can stand feeling like I’m inferior to you. But I guess it doesn’t matter right? Soon you’ll be gone and you’ll forget all about me, and you’ll meet someone in college who’s your age and doesn’t know a thing about gods or quests or special summer camps and you’ll live a normal life, and I’ll just be…here. Alone. Again. My mom died, my dad abandoned me in that fucking hotel for _years_ , my sister is gone, and now…you.”

 

Nico’s eyes were red and his face was stained with tears, and Percy didn’t even know what to say. “I just…Nico, why haven’t you told me any of this?”

 

He wiped tears out of his eyes. “Like I already said, I can’t fucking change anything. Percy, I feel death everywhere, but I felt life when I was with you. Now it just feels like we’re dying, and there isn’t anything I can do to stop it.”

 

Percy felt himself tearing up too. “Hold on…Are you breaking up with me? It doesn’t have to end like this Neeks, we can work through it. Now that I know how you feel-”

 

Nico cut him off and shook his head. “I…think this is for the best, Perce. Now you’re free, you can go to college and not have to worry about me.”

 

Now Percy was crying, full on, something he didn’t do very often. “You know I’m gonna worry about you either way, Nico.”

 

Nico shrugged. “I can’t control that. I can take care of myself, I always have anyway.” He kissed Percy on the cheek. “Let’s get back to camp, they’ll probably wonder where we are.”

 

Percy cleared his throat and nodded as he brushed tears off his face. He started the car again and pulled out of the gas station, heading toward camp. He left the music off.


End file.
